WHEN: 8:30pm EST, March 31, 2012

WHERE: At my apartment in Portland, ME (Alderaan)

FORMAT: DVD on a Vizio 47″ LCD HDTV

COMPANY: Occasionally roommate Elliot, sporadically roommate Nancy

PHYSICAL AND MENTAL STATE: Tired. Not wanting particularly to watch.

I have spent the majority of this viewing peeling the labels off of applesauce jars, for reasons best known to myself. A funny thing happens to you after you have seen High Fidelity 13 times. There is a numbness that overcomes you. I know what happens next. Even though I know most of the specifics of the movie, I have not yet memorized all of them. If I try to speak the dialogue along with the movie. I can almost keep up, but every few sentences I end up getting a word or two wrong, or skipping a line. Without specifically focusing on some part of the movie, I now find it very difficult to concentrate (hence the peeling of labels off of applesauce jars.) The following are some of the disjointed thoughts and observations I had during this viewing.

Marie DeSalle Hunger Games Supplemental:

Last week I took a look at how various characters from High Fidelity would do in Suzanne Collins’s The Hunger Games. In doing so, I forgot about Marie DeSalle. I think that it is worth noting that while Marie DeSalle might not have the brute strength to take out many of her competitors, she would be suave enough to capture the hearts of the rich sponsors watching the games. This could boost her chances of survival significantly. I would give her a 60% chance of getting to the final 5 contestants. And speaking of Marie DeSalle…

Marie DeSalle CD Track Listing:

When Rob pops Marie DeSalle’s album into his stereo, you can momentarily see the track listing. I have transcribed it here for your reading pleasure:

1. Baby I Love Your Way 2. Pasty Cline Times Two 3. Ghostbusters 4. Beat it 5. Baby got Back 6. 911 is a Joke 7. I Will Survive 8. Mmm Bop 9. My Heart Will Go On 10. You Can’t Have It 11. The Time Is Now

I have had arguments with people about whether or not this list is intended to be canon. I contend that it lingers on the screen long enough for several of the tracks to be read in any given viewing, and as such, is intended to be seen. The argument for the list being a joke, unintended to be seen, is that the track list is too silly. To me, Marie DeSalle seems like the type who would purposely choose bizarre songs like these to show that she could be sexy while singing them. Proving that she was “too cool for school,” as it were.

Further Confirmation that Rob is an Asshole:

When he is listing the four damning pieces of information that Laura probably told Liz (1. he slept with someone else, 2. while she was pregnant, 3. leading to her terminating the pregnancy, 4. he then borrowed a bunch of money), he has some type of excuse for all of them except for his initial infidelity. Considering the fact that this was the cause of three of the four in the first place, I find his lack of any explanation for it particularly damning.

Rocky and Adrian, Rob and Sarah:

In a relationship, Rob says, it is always important to punch your weight. By his own estimation, he and Sarah Kendrew matched. That is, until he has a chance to sit down, talk with, and reevaluate her. After this, he decides that sleeping with her would be “like sleeping with Talia Shire in Rocky, if you weren’t Rocky.” Obviously this is intended as a bit of an insult. Which brings up a couple of questions. First, why is he so much better than Sarah all of a sudden? Secondly, did comparing them to Sarah just insult both Rocky and Adrian? In regards to the first question, I think that Rob has just been disillusioned regarding Sarah. He has discovered that she is, and probably always has been, an emotionally unstable, chemically dependent mess. Is Rob much better than this, between his angst and his dependence on his record addiction? Not by all that much. But it is enough for Rob. What really bothers me however, is his Rocky comment. Adrian is not the demented wreck of a human being that Sarah is. She may be terminally shy, and extremely socially awkward, but there is nothing damning in that. The only thing that made Rocky the right person for her was that he was able to see past her protective shell, and see Adrian for the wonderful loving woman she really was. So fuck you, Rob, for comparing Sarah to Adrian. Adrian is good enough for anyone, but not everyone would be good enough to see that part of Adrian. Sarah is desperate enough to take anyone, but it takes someone equally desperate to take Sarah. Rocky had to fight to get Adrian. Rob had to fight to keep Sarah at bay. Fuck you, Rob.

Join me next week when I soak the apple sauce jars in oil to get the glue off of the glass.