WHEN: 11:46pm EST, November 29th, 2012

WHERE: In the living room of my apartment in Portland, ME (Isla Nublar)

FORMAT: Blu-Ray on a Vizio 32″ LED HDTV


PHYSICAL AND MENTAL STATE: Mirthful, filled with bar food, just came back from a comedy show, drinking Nice! Refreshing Cola {Cool & Crisp Soda}.

TODAY’S FOCUS: Two Movies at the Same Time, Whaaaaat?

Today’s suggestion comes to us from a Mr. Philip Hobby, who joined me for a viewing way back when. Since next year’s experiment is to watch Back to the Future 52 times, why not transition to that by watching it in the corner of Top Gun?

To the iPhone!


No, the title screens don’t match up. For demonstrative purposes only.

Everybody knows the best way to experience Dark Side of Oz is to have somebody else do it and describe it to you, so… here we go!


  • The company logos pop up at the same time, as do the “A Tony Scott/Robert Zemeckis Film” credits.
  • Unfortunately, James Tolkan’s opening credit does not appear at the same time in both.
  • Kenny Loggins does not sing “overdriiive…” while Marty is cranking the overdrive. But it is so close. Now I see why people do this high.
  • When Marty is hanging off of the jeep, the driver looks back at him as Cougar says, “Shit, what’s he doing?”
  • Double Tolkans! “Do not fire until fired upon!” and “No McFly ever amounted to anything in the history of Hill Valley!” occur around the same time. (It’s difficult to tell how much, as the audio to Back to the Future is off.)
  • The pacing is very different between the two films. One is usually in the middle of a thrilling action scene while the other is showing quiet dialogue.
  • Old Drunk Lorraine is onscreen when Wolfman says, “This gives me a hard-on.” *uggghhhh*

“This makes my boner cry.” – A line found nowhere in Top Gun

  • Goose says, “The bet is 20 dollars,” when Doc says, “You’re gonna see some serious shit.”
  • The DeLorean makes it’s first trip through time while all the pilots are singing “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin’.”
  • The Libyan car chase matches up with the first hop pretty well. It’s legitimately awesome. “You can run, kid, but you can’t hide.”
  • Jester shouts, “Jesus Christ!” exactly when Marty goes back in time.
  • Okay, this is amazing: buzzing the tower lines up with Marty running over Old Man Peabody’s pine tree. “God damn son of a bitch!”
  • Slider’s big “YEEEEEEAH!” happens while George is watching Lorraine undress.

Seeing a boob is a big deal living in a PG world.

  • Oh God. OH GOD. “Take My Breath Away” starts playing as Lorraine gropes her future son in a dark room. Oh no.
  • SIDE NOTE: Cinema 52 has destroyed my Top Gun Blu-Ray. It keeps freezing at the exact same spot. Might be time for a format switch. (This will throw the sync off a bit, but the freeze is very brief.)
  • Maverick says he needs to take a shower as Marty’s mom squeezes his leg. Then they both leave the house of the woman who was hoping to bone them.
  • Maverick leaves his wing man while Marty plays wing man to his dad.
  • Mav yells, “Take the shot!” and Marty punches Biff in the face. WHAM-O! Awesome.
  • Goose ejects at the exact moment Biff and pals crash into the shit truck.
  • Lorraine kisses Marty as Charlie says, “When I first met you, you were larger than life.”
  • When Viper says, “There’d be no disgrace. That spin was hell. It would have shook me up,” George is helping a post-assault Lorraine off the ground.
  • Young Lorraine is onscreen when Wolfman says, “I’m gettin’ a hard-on.”

There we go.

  • Mav launches the final missile when the alarm clock in the DeLorean rings.
  • “You can be my wing man any time,” happens right after the DeLorean returns to 1985.
  • CUTE: Stinger mentions “every newspaper in the English-speaking world” while Red the bum is covered in newspapers.

Crazy drunk pilot.

  • Nice, Marty stops the DeLorean as a jet screeeeeches to a halt on the runway.
  • Doc gets “murdered” the second time to the strains of “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin’.” It’s pretty eerie.
  • Top Gun ends, credits and all, as Lorraine opens up the box of A Match Made in Space books.

This was one of my most enjoyable viewings in a while, and I wonder if it’s because I had just the smallest glimmer of hope in the corner of the screen. Back to the Future makes me happy, Top Gun inspires hatred. It’s like a spoonful of ice cream after every punch in the face. For 110 minutes.

To be honest, I love mashing albums with movies. More than I should. Future Cinemanaut Becca and I used to pass the time with all sorts of geeky A/V fuckery, and I once kicked off a blind movie-mash contest with Cinemanaut John and Webmaster Derek. (Ask John what goes best with Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure.) I would have tried it with Top Gun this year, but muted sound doesn’t count as a viewing, and I really can’t stomach any more Maverick than is required of me for this experiment. But for the record, I’d try Fatboy Slim’s You’ve Come a Long Way, Baby or They Might Be Giants’ Flood, which, side note, Becca and I discovered goes crazy good with An American Tail: Fievel Goes West. Start up Flood when the blue sky fades in behind the director’s credit and you’re golden.

You’ll thank us. Trust me.

I really should try the opposite movie set-up (little Gun, big Future) towards the end of next year’s experiment, after I’ve seen BTTF an extra fifty times or so. By then it might feel like twice the face punches.


  • This is the first time I noticed that Air Boss Johnson’s mug says “Red Neck.” Is that his call sign? Does an Air Boss get a call sign?
  • The hair stylist for Top Gun is listed as “Ramsey.” One name. That is bold.